Chillin’

C is for Cold Canada

FLOATER’S BLOG: Beach Date, September 18th 2025

So a friend and I went to the beach the other day.

We were looking for a nice beach in the Toronto area because we thought; it’s going to be the last nice day of the summer, its mid-September and the forecast says it's going up to 28° Celsius (that’s 82 Fahrenheit). Eventually, we decided instead of Toronto, we would go up to Wasaga Beach - one last stab at a nice sandy shoreline in the southern Ontario region.

Two hours drive or so north of Toronto, Wasaga Beach is both a little tourist town and the name of a beach at the bottom end of Georgian Bay, which is part of one of the Great Lakes of North America, Lake Huron. The beach itself, divided into 6 zones, is just a portion of what is considered the longest freshwater beach in the world. Entering means wading in the clear water over white sand for a long way before you can consider swimming as it has a very shallow slope. However, floating in a tube can be done fairly close to shore given sufficient butt clearance.

My plan was a final Canadian natural waters float prior to this winter’s travel. With such shallow water and a calm day, hours of sunshine can really make for warm liquid, thus the beach’s immense summer popularity. However, I knew this being September and the sun not passing as directly overhead, the water temperature would be a might bit chillier than the air. Yet, I was going to brave it knowing the pleasure of the experience would outweigh a twinge of discomfort whence assuming my seated position. I had a couple of Muskoka Brewery ‘Tread Lightly’ Light Lagers on ice to accompany my peaceful pastime, a trusty beerfloat.calm koozie and my floating sunglasses to keep squinting to a minimum while taking in the scenery.

Exactly as we had not planned, we get there and it’s cloudy, the wind is blowing in off the lake and it’s only 22°.

So that sucked!

But, luckily I had plopped a couple of ultra light collapsible low rise chairs in our vehicle too, so we perched on the beach for a couple of hours to enjoy some fabulous focaccia sammies from a local Italian deli, take in the clean air and sounds from the little breakers, in which time the sun did arrive making for an agreeable afternoon after all.

For a better float opportunity we should have driven south to Crystal Beach on Lake Erie where the north wind bringing in that cold front didn’t reach until much later in the day. Ces’t la vie!

Here is an amusing anecdote from our search for which beach to attend in the Toronto region. I came upon the 8th ranked beach on Trip Advisor for ‘Beaches in Toronto’, Bloordale Beach.

This is in fact not a beach nor was it ever a beach. If you go to the spot where it is supposed to be you will find the brand new Bloor Collegiate Institute high school. However, for a couple of years before construction, the land had been cleared of whatever structure was there in the past, leaving a vast field of white gravel/sand/dirt surrounded by an easy to bypass fence, which as of this publishing still appears on Google Earth’s Street View.

This sight became a local sunbathing haven to the point where a few people generated outstanding reviews of ‘the beach’ in such a satirical manner that Trip Advisor has failed to realize they have been bamboozled. I love it!

You would think that either their actual people or their A.I. would be able to recognize they have the beach marked on their map in the center of a big city almost 4 km from the nearest coastline? Note to self: Don’t trust fact checking at Trip Advisor.

Anyway, much as I like making contributions to apps like Google Maps when businesses have moved or a new bike trail has been built, there is no chance I am going to offer up this carelessness on the part of Trip Advisor, rather; I prefer to let others enjoy these amusing reviews of a beach which never existed. Sounds like something I might do?

So, back to my last bathing suit clad beach day in Canada this year. No float, but a satisfying visit never-the-less. Cheers to us! 

It always happens at this time of year, floating season is over. So sad, because I do really appreciate the heat and the opportunities it provides. I can understand some people find hot weather uncomfortable but for me it’s a lot better than freezing your balls off! They say, “Thank goodness it’s over”, but for me the heat is what it's all about because that means every day is has beer floatation possibilities!

Guess I will go into hibernation as there are still months before scheduled travel although I do think I see south-east Asia is in my near future.

Unhappy salutations,

Corliss

beer float.calm = beerfloat.net not beerfloat.com