Easter

Easter – by Corliss Buenavida

I just got back to the Villa last night, having spent a few weeks in Mexico and Canada, so after grabbing ‘my usual’ great brunch at Dale Pues and getting a couple of chores done, I had an opportunity to get in the pool for a relaxing early afternoon float and think about all the noise drifting up from town and why San Juan Del Sur is so busy this weekend.

Well, like most Latin American countries, Nicaragua has a large Catholic society, so they are obviously celebrating Easter.

Ah, Easter, that special time each year where we focus our attention on seeking decorated eggs, often filled with chocolate. This pagan spring ritual, named after the Anglo-Saxon fertility goddess Ēostre, has had a religious connotation dumped on it since Christians trying to spread their gospel merged their folklore with the pagan celebrations. So, observances based on reality, the spring breeding season in the animal world, hence eggs and rabbits, were taken over by zealots selling some miracle story they claimed happened 8oo years earlier which obviously nobody could fact check.

Along that line of thought, if you like your news to come from social media sources then you might also like all these fabulous Easter truths!

Holy Week is the week we spend hollowing out egg shells for decoration all starting with a pin hole at the end of each egg to drain the albumin and yolk.

The Last Temptation of Christ is based on when his worship spent his last of forty nights in a Judean Desert brothel where he was spending time with very tempting fast women (also called fasting).

Good Friday is actually a weekly occurrence usually termed as TGIF or Thank Goodness Its Friday and also called Pay Day when everyone named Judas gets 30 pieces of silver.

Easter Saturday is occupied by Hockey Day in Canada celebrating the first day of NHL Playoffs, where as in normal weeks we have Hockey Night in Canada which is preceded by a race between a tortoise and a fluffy little rabbit – I had to get an easter bunny in here somehow!

Easter Sunday is the rejoiceful culmination honoring when the rabbit comes out of the cave and sees his shadow. Maybe I got that one a bit wrong?

Anyway, here in San Juan Del Sur they have it right – celebrate spring like pagans – all over the beach and almost every street there is a big party atmosphere, with multiple kiosks and large temporary DJ stages. Its like being at the midway of a fair or carnival. Loud, chaotic, revelry!

If only all religion related activities could be this festive perhaps, we wouldn’t have such extensive warfare on the planet. Not that all wars are based on cults and their beliefs but its the same, ‘you don’t think like me, I hate you, I’m taking over’ mentality which causes so much senseless death.

Why can’t earthlings just get along with each other?

I suggest we need a uniting common enemy, and I don’t mean Mr. Trump, although he is doing a pretty good job of getting the rest of earth to focus its hatred on the good old U.S. of A. No, my recommended focus is a common enemy to all people of this planet, an alien race, or all aliens. We won’t be killing each other if we are all fighting to stop Alf, Mork and E.T. from taking over. Maybe those are bad examples, but you get the idea.

I suspect there are some powerful groups here on earth who are benefiting from our warring ways and that is why they are covering up UFO sightings and alien interactions.

We need a common enemy to fight against instead of fighting each other, and if it helps the religious folks out, we can attach their folklore to the history of earth’s great battle for survival. Maybe the aliens can approach our constellation in giant colourful egg-shaped space craft filled with evil blood thirsty bunny warriors?

No problem, we will have our ace in the sky, space pilot out there to protect us!

And we will all have a happy, peaceful and festive Easter.

Hop to it and get your float in, before you are too busy hunting for chocolate!

Corliss

beerfloat.calm = beerfloat.net not beerfloat.com